Of the many minor annoyances that I encounter on a daily basis, those little things that sap your morale and, over time, your strength and will to live, two of the most stupid ocurr at Waterloo and Putney station. Most mornings I get off the Northern Line at Waterloo, I walk up the steps and get on the escalator between the Northern and Bakerloo lines. I say 'the escalator', in fact there are three of them - two on the right go up, the one on the left comes down, so I go up on the right hand side and then walk directly across to the barriers out of the Underground system. Now, given that this is the shortest route between the Northern and Bakerloo Line platforms and the regular rail platforms of Waterloo, and that the slightly more convenient route is less convenient because they're repairing the escalators, this little hall gets quite busy in the mornings. You basically have a nearly constant stream of people coming up from the Underground and a similarly constant stream of people coming down from the train station, these two streams of people could move easily past each other were it not for one thing - despite having to come up (and go down) the escalator on the right side you have to use the exit (or entry) barriers on the left hand side. This means that people coming in both directions always have to walk across the flow of the people coming in the opposite direction with all the stopping, starting and oh-sorry-after-you that this entails. It seems such an obvious problem that is so simple to solve, and yet, instead of that, London Underground Ltd chooses to make everyone's day just a tiny little bit more difficult. Having successfully navigated the Waterloo rapids I can get on a train and relax for quarter of an hour and, given the time I usally manage to drag myself into work, the similar situation at Putney station is less of an issue for me but, by that time, I am attuned to the problem. So I get off the train at Putney and go to the stairs to get out of the station. Hanging above the stairs there is a big sign saying 'Keep Left'. As you walk up the stairs there is another hanging sign at the top, 'Keep Left'. You get to the top of the stairs and reach the gates, of which there are five, two to get in, three to get out and the three to get out are, yes, on the right hand side...
So the Northern Line is a disaster, it's taking me two hours to get home from work and yesterday it rained while all this was happening, but still some things in life amuse. Last night I got the rail replacement bus service from Bounds Green to Finchley Central, the bus was quite distinctive in that it was dark blue, in contrast to all the red buses in London, had the number 803 which, to my knowledge, is not a bus journey that exists in North London, and was the oldest bus I've been on this century. As we came up Ballard's Lane there was a woman standing at one of the bus stops talking to, I assume, a friend - she saw the bus coming and obviously started saying good bye and then walked out into the road (why that's stupid, I'll get onto another time) and signalled at this dark blue, number 803 bus. We stopped at the lights which gave her the opportunity to walk right up to us and start tapping on the door with an increasingly frustrated look on her face. This look was nothing compared to the one when the bus driver, continuing to ignore her, drove off as the lights change and we were treated to a few quite blatant gestures. Now I found all this quite amusing, this woman obviously doesn't care where the bus came from or where it might be going to but was still mightly offended that it didn't stop and pick her up. Given the amount of attention she pays to what buses look like I wonder if she lives her life in constant confusion because every bus she gets on seems to take her to a different place?
